Former Leeds Rhinos star Kevin Sinfield has revealed he misses playing rugby league on a daily basis following his code switch.
The ex-England captain brought the curtain down on his illustrious career in the 13-man game in October after leading Leeds to the treble and is now four months into his new life as rugby union player with Yorkshire Carnegie.
Sinfield, whose book on his rugby league career is published on Saturday, had intended to support his old club from the stand once he quit as a player but reveals he has so far attended only one game.
"I went to the World Club Challenge, which was quite difficult to watch," Sinfield said.
"It's tough because I miss playing rugby league every single day and I will for the rest of my life, I'm sure.
"I played with a number of them for 10 or 15 years and those bonds will never leave you. It's been quite difficult getting the right balance between being there and giving each other a break from it.
"At times I've been torn by that but I was delighted to see them win on Friday. I was at home cheering them on."
The Rhinos have struggled in the absence of their inspirational former skipper, as well as the retired Jamie Peacock, and were bottom of Super League after three matches.
But Leeds have won two of their last three games and Sinfield is confident they will be challenging to retain their trophies.
"They've had a real tough spell but that's been down to injuries and to add to that the training ground was flooded and becoming nomads makes life really difficult," Sinfield said.
"Also the team is built for summer rugby and the conditions so far aren't conducive to that. As the grounds firm up, I have complete confidence that group will flourish, as they started to do on Friday night."
Sinfield would like to play for Carnegie at Premiership level, but concedes he is still getting to grips with the 15-man game.
"I'm getting better," Sinfield said of his fly-half role. "I'm learning.
"I'm still making plenty of mistakes, as you could imagine for somebody who had never played a game in his life.
"The lads have been really welcoming and I've really enjoyed the challenge. To have something like this at 35 has been brilliant, it's probably opened my eyes a bit.
"It looks very similar to rugby league but when you start playing it's so, so different. I've played league since I was seven and to suddenly break down some of those instincts and start to find fresh ones is very, very difficult. It's been testing but I'm glad I did it."
Watch Kevin Sinfield and Yorkshire Carnegie host Bedford on Easter Sunday, live on Sky Sports 3 HD from 3.45pm